Test each partner’s capacity for differentiation.Rather than thinking of them as being in a fixed sequence, you might approach them as benchmarks in your work with partners who are afraid to explore their differences. Here are 4 core principles for dealing with conflict and intensity in couples therapy that I have shared in countless workshops. Whatever pattern you’re seeing, you will benefit from having a strong strategy that addresses the couple’s unique situation and helps them move forward.Īddressing fear of conflict, step by step Or the fact that one partner tends to dominate the conversation, offering lengthy explanations that gloss over the issues you’re trying to explore. Your first clue may be the long, tense silences that follow when you pose honest questions. In looking at the challenges posed by this pattern, it’s clear that conflict avoidance reveals itself in many ways. In my last post, I shared 4 key insights that can help you lay the groundwork for counseling couples who shy away from conflict.
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